Monday, April 18, 2011

Sexuality as Women Age


One of the things that I love the most when I do a party is when I have women there who are the the mom or grandmother of the hostess or another guest.  These women generally are quietly sitting there, flipping through a catalog.  The whole vibe coming from them is entirely different then the younger party guests in their 20's who loudly laughing and blushing at the items on display.  The mix of young and middle-aged women guarantee it's going to be an interesting night!

An article in Times titled "The Science of Cougar Sex: Why Older Women Lust" discusses a study on whether evolution pushes women to become more sexual as they reach their early 30's and 40's.  A psychologist from the University of Texas by the name of David Buss claims that it's because women's fertility begins to decline as menopause approaches, so we naturally begin wanting more and more sex in order to procreate before it's too late.  I'm not a doctor, psychologist or anything even close to either of those, however, I am a woman who also gets the opportunity to talk with other women about their sex lives and I'd like to offer my own thoughts as to why this might be if it is, in fact, true.

I think that as we get older, women become more comfortable with their sexuality.  When we're younger, we're more likely to be less experienced with our own bodies so not only don't know what we like, but aren't brave enough to tell our partner what we want even if we did know.  Now add to that how things are changing in the world in regards to sexuality in general.  I remember as a teenager when TLC sang, "Let's Talk About Sex" and it shocked us that they would play that on the radio.  We blasted it from our cars and felt rebellious.  Sex wasn't everywhere you looked and listened as much as it is now, and we certainly didn't have sex toy parties in our homes.  The information that is now available to us is abundant.  We're learning it's normal to not be 'normal', and it's more socially acceptable to be a sexual person as a woman.  We've finally given ourselves permission to enjoy all physical pleasure has to offer.

Those women at the parties quietly sitting there reading their catalogs...by the end of the show, they are shocking the younger girls.  They are playing the games, asking the questions that no one else is brave enough to ask, giving their own tips on giving a better BJ, all with an un-embarrassed, un-apologetic attitude.  So the next time you see that older woman at the grocery store with her business clothes, or her weekend casual sweats, don't underestimate what might be underneath. It's as the saying goes, a lady in public, a freak in the bedroom.

3 comments:

  1. I wish there was a "like" button
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks! So glad you liked it :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Pam,
    I'm going to write a post on this, because this has absolutely been the experience of the Anonymous8. I do believe it completely. Great post. I like how you put your experience from parties in here as well.

    Sarah Baron
    Anonymous8

    ReplyDelete